Stop Feeling Stuck in 2024 and Start Building a Life You’re Proud Of

Maman Cooper
Mar 25, 2024
7 min read

White woman on a beach faces toward the sun with her arms out by her sides; clearly feeling blissful and free.

Getting unstuck will lead you to build and live a fulfilling life.

Don't go through another day, week, month, and year feeling stuck.

Sitting in that feeling of being stuck is painful.

The confusion, frustration, powerlessness, and helplessness that come with the reality of someone or something else controlling you negatively is devastating.

I know this so well because, up until October 2023, I felt stuck. This made me feel defeated because I didn't know how to stop it.

My Story of 'Stuck'

During the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020, I connected with a guy who I soon realized wasn't good for me.

However, at some point down the line, I had come to believe that partially because I was genuinely a good person, my goodness, kindness, and love for him would inspire a positive change in him to treat me with dignity and encourage him to want to become a better person.

Whew! Big, big mistake.

Six months later, we got married in April 2021. I quickly realized that I had become trapped in an unhealthy marriage.

I cried so many nights and was suffering inside because of how poorly I was being treated in the relationship.

I had confirmation that I had married wrong, but I felt that I couldn't get a divorce.

My religion and culture frown on divorce, and I was also ashamed of a failed marriage;

I felt stuck.

My self-esteem and self-worth took a significant decline just a few months into being married.

Seven months in, I did leave and filed for divorce.

I thought that because I'd become so resilient from overcoming a lot in the past, bouncing back and rebuilding my life after this relationship would be simple.

Ha! I wish it was that simple!

My journey of getting a divorce and rebuilding my life post-divorce brought confusion and frustration.

Well, that is a snapshot of how my period of feeling stuck started.

To learn more about this, subscribe to my YouTube channel, as I will share more of this experience in-depth.

Back to you:

Now that you know my experience of feeling stuck, I want to hear from you.

Share in the comments below what is causing you to feel stuck.

The truth is, there's always a root cause to this.

Luckily, you don't have to keep living this way.

Here are your no-time-waster hacks to get unstuck and build a life you're proud of:

1. Prayer and therapy

I am combining these two life-changing hacks because of their difference in my life.

If you don't believe in 'religion' or therapy or both, I encourage you to keep reading anyway because sometimes the things that will help us are the ones we don't even know exist or that we're skeptical of at first.

While in a toxic and abusive marriage, I struggled to navigate the need to get a divorce as a Christian; I had so many questions.

"Is it right for me to get a divorce?"

"What does the Bible say about divorce?"

"Can I remarry after divorce?"

"Should I remain married but separated instead of getting a divorce?" and so on.

Man! I DO NOT miss those times.

I did not want to disappoint GOD although I knew the marriage would destroy me and that if I had children with him in that relationship, I would only be repeating the cycle of abuse and toxicity I was exposed to early on in life growing up.

I felt so alone and confused during those days.

Prayers and really talking to GOD revealed what my life would look like if I stayed in the relationship and what it would look like if I left.

I will certainly discuss this on a YouTube video, so subscribe to learn how I knew it was time to get a divorce.

Therapy allowed me to share what was happening and my thoughts with a third person who could listen objectively and with as much impartiality as possible.

I was able to have a therapist ask me questions to reflect on my blind spots, hold me accountable in a safe space, and affirm positivity in me to get back to the woman I had lost while in the relationship and even become better and stronger.

So, an essential method to get unstuck is through prayer and therapy.

2. Define your life's vision

It helps to know your purpose to discover and craft a vision for your life, but you can still find your vision even if you don't yet know your overall life's purpose; this is where prayers and therapy will also really serve you.

Instead of setting goals for the year, discover your true vision and let it guide your life and choices.

Like many people, I used to set yearly goals until I realized that I was working very hard each year, and yet, my life was stagnant.

Instead, my resolutions rolled into the following year, year after year.

I sometimes felt like I was deceiving myself, saying, "This will be the year I accomplish these goals."

Have you been there?

It felt like sprinting for miles, thinking you'd reach a destination, only to realize you're on a treadmill; still in the same spot.

It was only when I stopped focusing on new year goals and instead zoned in on realizing my vision that I felt my life propel forward.

The difference I've noticed between finding my vision and setting goals is that a vision narrows down what matters most to you and helps you learn how you need to best show up for the people you serve, whether that's your family, people at work, ministry, in your romantic relationship, etc.

Focusing on finding your vision instead of setting goals will cut out being distracted by the wrong things, people, and the many unnecessary to-do lists that don't move the needle to your greater self and purpose.

Knowing your vision will strengthen your ability to say goodbye to the wrong kind of men or women while dating.

A clear vision will also quickly lead you to say no to opportunities that don't serve your greater self and help you better manage expectations and how to spend your time.

There's something about knowing your vision and committing to it that you just don't have time to waste on the wrong people and things.

There are so many more aspects of vision and how to get unstuck but we're stopping here because this is only a brief introduction to get you started for now.

Please let me know in the comments below if you would like to dive deeper into this topic with me and I'll create more content around it.

3. The 20-Idea Method

Whew!!! So, I recently discovered this one from a short clip I saw on Instagram by Brian Tracy who is a Comedian-American Motivational Speaker.

I was scrolling on Instagram one day when I heard this Method and thought, "OMG! I've got to try this."

I tried it for one of my visions for 2024: how to afford the publication of my first book, which I am self-publishing.

Self-publishing is costly if you want to put a quality book out there.

I previously felt frustrated when I begin to feel that I might need to move my publication to 2025 due to my finances.

Then, I discovered this 20-Idea Method; the result was mind-blowing.

I went from feeling stuck, helpless, and thinking about pushing the publication of my book to 2025 to coming up with so many ideas for funding the publication in 2024.

You can get a free part of the book's copy by signing up for my email list at the end of this page if you're curious to get a sneak peek.

I tried this method, and whoa!!! I would be selfish not to share!

Earl Nightingale, "an American radio show host and author… who was passionate about the power of ideas," created the 20-Idea Method.

-Jake Courage

Although Brian Tracy is credited by many people including myself for us discovering this method, you will need to do your own research to confirm who originally developed this idea because some people say that it was Brian Tracy.

Back to the 20-Idea Method - how this method works is that you ask yourself, "How can I (insert your goal) or challenge that you're trying to solve?

For example, "How can I afford to self-publish my book in 2024?"

Then, use a sheet of paper and, without filtering yourself, jot down 20 ideas of how you could solve the challenge you're struggling with or need a solution for -- in the case of my example, I would come up with at least 20 ways to afford to pay for publication.

You should also do some research if you need help to develop 20 things, but you most likely will come up with many ideas on your own of how to solve that challenge you're trying to solve.

If the challenge you're trying to solve for yourself is finances, please don't include "rob the bank" as one of your possible solutions.

That sounds like a recipe for disaster and getting seriously stuck in life on a different level.

Don't say, "Maman didn't warn me."

But on a serious note, try this 20-Idea Method.

Here's my rule of thumb for effectively applying the 20-Idea Method:

Unless you've tried every single one of those ideas to solve the problem, you're not stuck; you need to decide to change your situation and commit.

When you decide to accomplish something and commit, instead of giving up, you will try again. You will try different ways to solve the problem, pivot, and find a different path if necessary.

Too often, we get so fixated on what's wrong that we don't see all the ways around us that we can fix the problem.

It's important to note here that there are times when you should give up on something, but that is something that you will know for yourself.

Don't quit just because it's too hard or because you sell yourself short and think that you're not someone who can achieve success at whatever you're working towards.

So, the next time you feel stuck, implement the 20-Idea Method and ask yourself, "Am I stuck, or do I just need to make a decision and commit to solving this problem?"

To summarize, here are the three no-time-waster hacks to get unstuck in 2024:

Prayer and therapy
Define your life's vision
The 20-Idea Method

Hey! I am confident that this article and the three methods to get unstuck just provided you with fantastic value.

I am here to support you. ALWAYS! Let's work together and make it our collective mission to stop feeling stuck in 2024. 👏

My mission is to serve you by bringing to you the mindset and practical steps to build relationships and a life that takes you from survival mode to thriving mode.

If you would like to return the favor and support me as well, here are a few things you can do: